I keep coming back to Edwina: The Dinosaur Who Didn’t Know She Was Extinct, by Mo Willems.
When a book is that foundational to your life, you just keep thinking of it over and over again.
If you have not had the privilege to read Edwina, let me tell you about it.
Edwina is a dinosaur who lives in a small town and bakes everybody chocolate chip cookies. She’s super nice and she also has a little purse.
Reginald Von Hoobie Doobie is a boy in school who is really pissed off by the situation of a dinosaur wandering around town, getting all this love and attention, while dinosaurs, in actuality, are extinct.
So he starts telling everybody he knows about how dinosaurs are really extinct and how Edwina can’t really exist even though everybody sees her and thinks she exists.
He hands out flyers.
He shouts it out in class, giving a background on science and dinosaurs with a lot of facts.
And everybody nods and says, “That makes sense.” But then their eyes glaze over when someone mentions Edwina’s chocolate chip cookies. And then they’re all staring off into space in a daze, thinking about chocolate chip cookies and how gooey and chocolatey they are.
Reginald Von Hoobie Doobie is super mad and frustrated that no one is listening to his very rational mind, listening to the facts, that he sort of loses his shit and starts crying one day. “Why won’t anybody listen to me?” he asks into the air.
And he hears a voice. “I’ll listen to you.” It’s Edwina.
He looks up and he is called to action. A captive audience? He’ll take it.
They go to Edwina’s house. He sits at her kitchen table and explains to her all the truths he knows, the facts and statistics about dinosaurs and time and meteor rockets and what have you. And Edwina listens very calmly, and patiently, and finally says something like, “Wow, Reginald, I think you’re right. I think I am actually extinct.”
So she sits back and thinks about that for a moment and then raises her arms and walks through a wall, smiling and floating, because even though everything Reginald says makes total rational sense, she just doesn’t care that she’s extinct. She’s happy, and she loves to make cookies, and she loves to spread joy, and all those facts and statistics don’t really matter.
And by that point, now that someone has actually heard Reginald out, now that someone has actually just taken the time to listen to him, he’s happy too. He’s willing to give up his agenda to convince everyone of this thing that was once so important. So he raises his arms and he walks through the wall, and everybody is really happy, and in the end Reginald is sitting down at Edwina’s table eating cookies and talking to her, because she’s now kind of his best friend for always.
Isn’t that beautiful and really, really cute?
I just love Reginald. What a sweetie.
I’m putting this out there because I want to tell you about what a “whole human being” is.
A Whole Human Being, or what the Greeks called Anthropos, is someone who is fully realized as a person, a person who has been able, among other things, to blend the masculine energy inside themselves with the feminine energy.
A person who has both a dick and a pussy.
Not necessarily on the outside, you see, though people with both parts are pretty fucking special, and know some special things. Native Americans, particularly Navajo, held these people up as gurus of the village. Two Spirit, they were called. (Did you know we killed a ton of Native Americans and destroyed their heritage and screwed their people over, and their people were really peaceful? It’s the worst.)
I’m talking not about sexual organs, but about energy. I’m talking about what Erich Schiffman, yogi and author, calls “push and yield,” as foundational to yoga philosophy. Push is the masculine energy. Yield is the feminine energy of surrender, of fluidity, of letting go.
We need both to make it in this life, to be fully realized spiritual people, because this should really be your only goal. You can have a house and a car and a savings account and all sorts of other things. You can have accolades and stuff, but the thing at root you should always be working toward is your own realization. The reason is because it’s the thing that’s going to make you happiest, and it’s the thing that’s going to help the most people around you. You may not be aware of this. That’s why I’m telling you. I’m so generous, see?
So within you (and I think Jung talks about this too, but I am not a psychoanalyst and I’ve tried to read Jung but I get a little bored even though I recognize he’s brilliant) are these two energies, your dick energy and your pussy energy. And it’s up to you to live in a way that honors both so you can be a whole human being.
This is what Jesus taught, you know. Wholeness. He taught people how to be fully human, to be whole without needing someone else to complete you. But we don’t tend to know this part of Jesus, because these angry guys took over his name and his message and came up with all these other sort of acrobatic things you’re supposed to “believe” in order to follow him and go to heaven when you die. It’s so fucking strange, because they just add all this stuff that wasn’t said, and then all these people listen to the angry guys rather than what the Teacher-Healer actually said. And we’ve gotten all fucked up.
You know who had it right? Mary Magdalene. Her gospel teaches this wholeness thing. Her gospel talks about how sin doesn’t really exist, but you make it happen on your own. Her gospel talks about how everything is interconnected, how everything is part of every other thing, that all belong to the root, which is the earth. You should read that, sister. It’s a good gospel. It’s pretty eye-opening.
But whoosh, I got sidetracked there. So my point is to tell you that throughout life, you’re going to have to go through each day using either your dick or your pussy. When life offers you a situation, you either surrender and let go, let come, or you act decisively and push. The energy of flow, of pussy, of waiting and pausing and being present, is the grounding, foundational energy. It’s what all the spiritual teachers teach. So ideally, each day you will be practicing a form of meditation that helps you let go and relax and surrender. And then there are times, like when you know your purpose, or when an injustice has been committed, or something like that, when waiting around and surrendering is totally not the answer. That is when your dick comes out, and it better be hard if you’re worth anything. And within that energy, you fucking move toward your goal. You fucking act.
And so life is this series of waiting, surrendering, letting go, and then, BOOM, something happens that calls you to action, and you fucking go, you swoop, you do the thing you have to do, and then you go back to your relaxed state.
Like a hawk.
Tags: been sleeping so long in a 20-year dark night and now I see daylight, Erich Schiffman's yoga book is my favorite yoga book if you want to get one, hawk eyes, I just bought a copy of The Vagina Monologues and I'm going to act it in acting class, Mary Magdalene, Read the Gospel of Mary Magdalene bitch, SexyJesus